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2012-04-19

是不是人人都適合被教練?(二)

  有一天,Mary約了Boris一起吃午飯,談到教練技術的應用。

 

  「Boris,上個月劉總監要求我給他的部門的其中一個員工進行教練。名字我不方便說。但是在進行了兩次約談之後,我觀察到對方只是敷衍我。對我所問的問題,他總是說不知道。第二次見面時,他甚至說是老闆叫他來,他沒有選擇。他覺得老闆認爲他有問題,才要他接受教練,所以很不情願。」

 

  「嗯,看來他像是個訪客,根本不相信教練這回事。在這種情况下,幷不適合進行教練。那你做了甚麽?」

 

  「我表示理解,同時也講了個故事。我說歷届的奧運,世界頂級的運動員雲集,每一個都是有教練陪伴著他們鍛煉、成長。幾乎沒有一個運動員是純粹靠自己天天拼命苦練而能達到事業的巔峰,取得參加奧運資格,更不用說奪得金牌。教練協助他們設定目標,給反饋讓他們知道自己的現况,發現自己的盲點,有系統地精益求精,不斷超越自己,一路上支持他們直到達到目標爲止。

 

  我也說姑且不管他是在怎樣的情况下來跟我約談,畢竟現在他是有機會體驗教練,何不好好利用這個機會讓自己從中得益?接著我問他他最想得到的人生金牌是甚麽。他聽了之後,咬著下唇,沉默了好一陣子。最後,我表示他一定是他老闆很器重的員工,否則也不會安排他接受教練。」

 

  「後來呢?」

 

  「我跟他說如果他願意繼續跟我做教練約談,可以跟我安排時間。然後就讓他走了。他是個有智慧的人,我相信他會作出最佳的選擇。他可能需要時間作思想準備吧。無論如何,我都會尊重他的選擇。」

 

  Mary was sharing the application of coaching with Boris over lunch one day.

 

  「Boris, I was asked by Mr Liu to coach someone from his department.  I won’t mention the name for confidentiality.  But after two sessions, I observed that he was less than keen.  To most of my questions, his favourite respond was ‘I don’t know.’  During our second session, he even said that he was sent and that he had no choice but to be there.  He felt that his boss thought that he was not good enough, and that was the reason for making him attend coaching sessions.」

 

  "Hm, it looks to me that he was a visitor.  He didn’t want to be there and he did not believe in coaching at all.  I would say he is not suitable to be coached.  I am curious, how did you deal with it?"

 

  "Well, I said I understood why he was reluctant.  Then I told him a story.  Every four years, the world’s top athletes gather in an Olympic city to compete.  Each of them has a coach with them.  Almost no one reached the top of their sports career just by training extremely hard on their own.  All of them have coaches to support them in their training, in achieving the qualification to compete in the Olympics, and some of them would eventually clinch a gold medal.  Coaches assist them in setting goals, giving feedback on where they are now, discovering their blind spots etc.  Then they systematically work with the athletes to constantly improve, make breakthroughs until they achieve their goals.

 

  I also said despite how he came to our session, the fact was he now had a chance to experience coaching.  He might as well seize this opportunity to make it work for himself.  Then I asked him what would be the gold medal of his life that he really wanted to win for himself.  He bit his lower lip and was silent for quite a while.  I ended our conversation by saying that his boss must have thought highly of him.  Otherwise he wouldn’t have arranged a coach for him."

 

  "And then?"

 

  "I made it clear to him that he could connect with me for the next session only if he wanted it.  Then I let him leave.  He is wise.  I believe he would make the best choice for himself.  He just need some time to think it through.  In any case, I will respect his choice."

 

 

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